LONELY MAMA 02 -From the Sketchbook

Three work tape sketches and some words on the writing of my forthcoming single!

From the Sketchbook is a series of posts where I share my songwriting process.

Paid subscribers can hear the final record of “Lonely Mama” by visiting this post. Everyone else will have to wait until 3/29/24 when the limited edition 45 rpm 7” single comes out on Pearl Jam guitarist Mike McCready’s HockeyTalkter Records. It will also be available digitally.

“Lonely Mama” will be included on my next full-length album. No idea yet on when that record will be released. Stay tuned to this space for news on that front.

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“Lonely Mama” was written for my birth mother, Barb. This post from January 19, 2024 explains how she passed away just months before I attempted to make contact with her.

AN IMPROV LEADS TO A SEED

It began with a folky, fingerpicked guitar in a John Prine vein. I improvised around and around, toying with potential melodies and before long this popped out:

Lordy mama, lordy mama
Can’t you hear the whistle blowin’?
I’ve been riding on this track so long
I can’t recall which way I’m goin’

The melody felt sturdy. Familiar in a good way. But those lyrics sounded a lot like song talk. They sounded like something I’ve heard a million times. It would have been easy for me to shut the whole endeavor down if I’d let myself become judgmental.

“Lordy mama? Whistles blowin’? Really, Pete?”

Thankfully, my inner critic did not derail me. Rather than questioning myself, I forged ahead. I had already hooked a vibe and a melody, but those lyrics had to go. These days, I prefer my songs to be anchored in the truth. In the past, I’ve written more than my fair share of cryptic lyrics. And I’m sure to write more abstruse songs before I’m through.

KEEP ON SEARCHING

As my initial improv continued, I sang, “In my dreams you’re always smiling.” This, along with the word “mama” in the opening line, made me think of my birth mother, Barb. Suddenly the undercurrent of the song shifted, and by two minutes into my improv a rough version of what would become my opening verse arrived:

Lordy Mama, lordy Mama
How I wish I could have known ya
We’d be dancing in the summer sun
Listening to Scarlet Begonias

Known ya with Begonias? I love that rhyme! By the time this verse was finished, I had tried many variations. At one point the lyric was:

We’d be swirling around in the summer sun
Twirling in and out to Scarlet Begonias

On the record I settled on:

We’d be twirling around in the summer sun
Freak flags flown high to Scarlet Begonias

CRAFT AWAY

After I’ve got a basic lyric framework, the craftwork continues. At this phase I’m concerned with a number of things. At times I’m thinking about what the line says. Other times I’m on the lookout for interesting internal rhymes while paying close attention to how subtle changes in lyric affect the melody and its rhythm. I could bore you to death with work tapes of me shooting out these subtle differences. For this song alone I have over three hours worth. Here’s a taste:

ENTER THE ERASER

My partner Elaine Summers gets the credit for upgrading “Lordy Mama” to “Lonely Mama.” If you’ve read my post about “Skeleton Crew” you know that she came up with that title as well. Then there’s the story of “Going Whichever Way the Wind Blows.” I was marble-mouthing nonsensical gibberish over a fingerpicked guitar when Elaine chimed in from the other room, “Did you just sing ‘going whichever way the wind blows?’” I said, “No, but that’s great!”

Elaine lived up to her nickname, The Eraser, on “Lonely Mama.” At first, the bridge was:

Once upon a time in a fairy tale that rhymed
A mother and child reunion
Could nothing ever be as heavenly a dream
I’ve had it many times before

Elaine suggested I remove “that rhymed” and “before,” and in both cases, the edit improved the melody and phrasing immensely. The Eraser strikes again!

PUTTING THE PIECES TOGETHER

We futzed with the arrangement before calling the song done. Early on, the song ended with a repeated bridge and a little outro bit. At one point I even had an additional verse after that! The Eraser would have none of it. In the end, it goes like this:

Verse - Verse - Bridge - Verse -Verse -Tag

No need to reinvent the wheel. It just works.

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT’S DONE?

When nothing bugs me. It might sound like an oversimplification but it really is as simple as that. I know it’s complete when I can enjoy singing the song all the way through without getting snagged on lines that don’t ring true or clunky words that don’t quite fit.

HOW IMPORTANT IS RINGING TRUE?

That’s a big question. Perhaps I’ll tackle that another time. For now, I can say this: “Lonely Mama” rings true for me.

Peace & Love Songs,

Pete

PS: Paid subscribers can download the sketches shared above—in hi-res if that’s your thing—by visiting my rarities page.